Writing can be a form of stimulation I feel, it is a very good way to release one's emotions in a subtle manner.

Cartel msg today again, this is her third attempt for a date and once again I fail to materialise it. She must have dislike me by now...

Taken at Raffles Hospital earlier....

I had to go for my check up at the Raffles Hospital today and I was feeling kinda uneasy at the thought of striping naked in front of a male doctor and the worst part of it all was that he had to feel for lumps around the breasts. The moment came when my name was called, I have to face the music but it all ended within minutes, surprisingly. It was a pretty quick one, perhaps because I was the last patient and all the doctors and nurses were eager to go home....good thing I wasn't alone, there's always someone to accompany me....how fortunate I am...

Di signed me up for the marathon today, it is a 10km jog. We gonnna start training ourselves for these couple of months else we will probably walk throughout the whole race...

Guess I will probably switch my california to Planet Fitness since I worked in Suntec which is more convenient for me. Speaking of which, I must make a trip down to california to cancel my membership, they keep charging to my card every month and I'm not even utilising it. Least I have a partner now when I go to the gym else it will always be a solo activity....Hope Di will keep to it and train regularly else when it comes to the Big thing, we will both have problem chasing the race...

We had pasta for dinner today, surprisingly that Phin's serves pretty good italian food as well though they are more to steaks and ribs. That was a pretty late dinner as we both finished work late but it was a good one....we had so much to rant about. She's gonnna come for the weekend retreat at the hotel this saturday, bet we will all have fun. She held my hand while we were walking, felt the adrenaline rush for the very first time....haven't had that feeling for quite awhile...it sure feels good...

I'll sleep well tonight.

The weekend

Weekends pass by really quickly, with an blink of an eye it is now Monday, a working day....a day where everyone dreads. Was at marina mandarin hotel on saturday night, really fond of their new look, a total face-lift. A good thing that they maintain their standards, had my favourite drink, the mocha ice-blend....never fail to miss that. This place brings back memories of how I used to hang out with jacq, almost 3-4 times a week when we were still together...Our bill always reaches the double digits, and all that for coffee only! You seriously pay for the quality of the drink and the ambience.

Had a ktv session earlier, my throat kinda feels sore at this moment, too much of singing I guess. Lots of plans made for the coming weekend, Geok and the rest suggested Rasa Shangri-la at Sentosa, a drive up KL, 'M' hotel, 'Grand Copthorne Hotel' or Bintan lagoon villa....I'm game for any of the above, just wanna get my tan and that's my only motive...haha. Geok is already beating me to it, I cannot lose out...haha. My life at this moment seems perfect, I seems to have everything now.

My bosses bought all the managers out for dinner today, we went to this Brazilian restaurant at Sixth Avenue, very good food I must say. I definately put on an extra kilo tonight. All kinds of meat and I really meant all kinds, the calf, the throat, many different parts but all taste extremely good though you would probably throw out once you know which part of the body it's from...

Am looking forward to another visit there, perhaps I should bring 'her' there one day....

Time flies thursday

Today seems to pass really fast...I manage a quick coffee during my lunch hour with a long-time friend that I have yet to meet for awhile...The one hour coffee past really quickly, seems like only 5minutes and there's only that much you can share within one hour...It's good to meet up again, feels like the good old days where everyone is so single and available.

I promise to brew some herbal drink for her, I'm acting on it now...it will soon be ready in another half hour. This is my first time doing it, hope it will taste good later...

I got my patrick mini beanie from June today, gonna put spongebob together with him so they can be together...Yes, they are gay. Perhaps that's one of the reason why I'm fond of them.

Today in the office, we were all talking about the rally that's coming. We can't afford to lose, the attention is on us now, especially me, being a newcomer and eager to prove myself, this has to be the ultimate chance to prove my worth...

The HR department's organising a year end trip and were taking in suggestions on where to go, I propose anywhere towards the west, kinda bored of the asian countries. Was hoping for europe since my company's kinda generous in terms of the spending power. The whole office will be close and while everyone else is slogging, we will be all away enjoying a paid trip...should be going after the rally's over. If we were to win, I bet the europe trip would be a sure-go.
Speaking of which, I have yet to take a flight with anyone. I just realised that I usually fly alone, yet to experience the excitement prior the take off with anyone....but I reckon I would soon experience it....the special someone.

Just had durians, kinda stuffed now...

Temptations.

I've found myself specially drawn to Bvlgari recently, I've been eyeing the ergon series...

I'm a Emporio Armani person and I will still remain loyal to my choice of brand. Bvlgari will be my second choice for now. Haven't been shopping lately, perhaps I should pop by the boutiques over the weekend. Been recieving the latest collection updates from Club 21, they sure spend lots on their collaterals. In one of those moods again...Thousands of dollars gonna be gone once I step into any one of these. No, I should practice some self-control.

Some thoughts on a lazy sunday afternoon.

I woke up with the rain pouring hard, there goes my sun-tanning session...

Some time back, I fell in love with the wrong woman. The misadventures that ensued provided me with enough reasons to stay humble forever. The experience was proof that I'm as subject to bouts of self-deception as everyone else in the world. It is now a good time to marshal my appreciation for comparable pride-levelling events in my own life. Since I'm poised on the verge of a new phrase of success, it's the perfect moment to recall how much I still have to learn...

Feeling ill....

My physical self finally gave in to all the late nights and long hours at work....I officially pronounced myself ill at this point in time. I'm running a tempurature, but am lazy to go see a doctor, hate the long queues and medical smell. Bought some panadols, hope it helps. I was feeling drowsy already yesterday but yet I still went clubbing with Geok...almost fell asleep while driving back home, hate to drive when it is late, always having difficulties keeping my eyes open.

Long day at work today, finished at 5pm and went to have a late lunch or you can consider a early dinner with Geok. This woman, she went sun-tanning without me, we were supposed to go together and she went this morning...haha. Can't blame her la, work beckons. I'm so tired and sick now, gonna sleep the night through.....Hopefully I get up tomorrow feeling better coz I got to do my swim and my healthy routines on sundays...

Commitment is a very big word to most people, it means having to share a part of your life with someone, or allowing the invasion of privacy to a certain extend. I'm starting to fear 'Commitment', once again I'm back to square one, back to those days where I only want to be able to commit to myself and no one else. The feeling of being in love is always so sweet and fresh but when everything else starts pouring in, the negative side of love tend to re-surface...

I'm in love, and every night my love will come to me, making me feel so very tired every night....but it's worth the fatigue. Just have to drink more red bull in future....

Geok called me this morning, she's very upset. Things happened overnight, so unexpected...managed to talk and console her alittle in the morning till my battery went flat...and at least she's feeling better now....hope she's sleeping well now.

Today's my youngest sister's birthday, we had a mini celebration at home, just within the family emebers. I've yet to buy her present, no time to go shopping for the past one week. I'm totally drained, felt like I've never slept enough and the hours are so very short. Been hanging out with Geok and May, seems like we've so much to talk about...the three of us can sit by somewhere and talk for hours, the best part was we stood by the roadside thinking of a venue to go and ended up chatting for 1.5 hours Standing!

Was at carrefour earlier during lunch and I met Evelyn, her office's at tower 3, just opposite my block. Such a coincidence, haven't seen her for for at least 2 years. We used to have a crush on each other when we were younger but things never happen between us because the timing's always wrong. We promised to catch up sometime this week, hopefully we will that is if my work schedule permits.

Haven't seen June since last wed, guess both of us are too occupied...

This will be a short entry, I need to get some sleep....need to rest my eyes..

Tuesday

Today's meeting was rather intense, Drake, my AGM blew his top on many of my colleagues, almost all the departments' managers. The sales figure doesn't look promising for the past few days and we need to double up the figures, this is sales and this is how the we play the game. Can understand his predicament as he is the overall in-charge, the second man to my big boss. He is answerable for all the project we've under-taken. I was having a long chat with my sales director that day and I just realised how big were we, I knew we were big but didn't realised we were that big. Bascially there are seven companies running simultaneously, we are into logistics, properties, consultancy, F&B, branding & loyalty, telemarketing and smart solutions....there's definately alot more growth in my new post. My Sales director, she's the wife of my big boss and she was telling me that my boss could have retire two years ago!!?? but he didn't, as he has his commitment to the staffs and the management. My two bosses are very young, only in the early thirties and in fact most of us, the management level, we are all in our mid or late twenties, perhaps that's why everyone of us can click because we belong to the same era more or less. I'm the youngest manager, if you are asking.

All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy, am looking forward to my weekend this week, gonna do something interesting...am counting down already.

My tummy's stirring....don't feel good at all, must be the meehoon goreng (supper) i ate earlier, the only meal I had the whole day. Only had coffee for lunch, didn't have much appetite in the day...

Supposed to catch up with a friend today but I guess our timing never meets though we worked pretty near to each other. This is like the third time we have arranged but usually we play by ear as we know there's always last minute changes, as expected...it happened today as well. She got off for a break and wanted to do a quick coffee with me but I was stuck, couldn't get off and when I finally get off my work, she's back in the office rushing for time-line...So near yet so far, this is the perfect statement for us. We keep adjourning our meeting till 'tomorrow' and the 'tomorrow' never comes...Let's see whether fate allows us to meet...Shall see about it.

Sat...

A long day I had...or rather should I say too long of a day if I were to include yesterday's. Got home wee hours this morning, about 4ish and only slept for a couple of hours and went straight to work. Seriously am amazed by my energy level, think I've repeated this statement at least a good two times. Spent a good three third of my sat in the office, left at about 4plus to catch June for a quick coffee before having my hair cut at far east...Feels good after a hair-cut, always looking forward to visit my stylist. Am thinking of keeping my hair long, I wonder how would it be like....haha. Poor June, got to wait and hang around til I finish my cut...Soon, nightfall came, as much as expected, we ended up in June's office again but this time round with two other guests, brought along Ailing and Wendy. The usual routine, played pool...etc...A good way to chill without having to spend...

My eyes are rather heavy at this point in time, need to quickly put them to sleep else I wouldn't have energy for COMEX tomorrow. Last day of the convention tomorrow, finally all will end. A Crazy week it has been...goodnight.

Thursday

......Sleep is all I need now....

Wednesday

Terribly busy today, could not even catch my breathe for a minute...practically worked more than 12 hours today I reckon. Finally wrapped up all the pending issues for the roadshow, stepped out of the office at 9pm, totally knocked out but that's not the end yet....went to meet up with two other friends at coffee bean...am amazed by my energy level sometimes but I'm not the superwoman, I know of someone who does more than me and get lesser than me....haha.

Anyway, I was mentioning I met my friends, they both bought along their girlfriends...feel kinda out for a moment but we sorta got comfortable after which..guess it just takes alittle warming up. Geok, she spoke about life being fair...here's what she said: 'When we are in love, we tend to take the positive side of love and neglect the negative part or rather not wanting to accept the negative side (breaking ups, quarrels..etc), but in reality we must be learn to take the negative side, thus it will then be balanced.' There's definately some truth in this and its take us awhile to realize that we must learn to take things at our stride. This is why we all have friends, friends to guide us and lead us to a better understanding though sometimes their advices can be full of crap...haha.

Another long day tomorrow, this will continue for the next four days to come....think I need to stock up afew more cans of red bull and eat more supplements...